make-up wake-up

SO i've discovered something immensely sad about myself and probably about most city girls, or at least most girls from London. Right now is the LONGEST length of time I've ever been without make-up. Depressing, much?! I've been trying to explain it to the other girls here... It's like, back home, when I first wake up and right before I go to sleep (i.e. when I'm not in make up), I don't consider that to be my face. Whoever it is looking back at me in the mirror is me-without-makeup and how i look the rest of the day I consider to be actually ME. SO being here, OBVIOUSLY i will not wear any as there's just no need... And it feels so weirdly and embarrassingly liberating! I can't believe that something as pathetic and unimportant as MAKE-UP which is just bullshit chemicals and crap that we layer on our face daily because it is SOMEHOW considered NORMAL could have such a hold on me! For my first week here I found it strange to look in to the mirror and always see my bare face. My own face kept shocking me. That is MESSED UP! I don't even wear that much make-up usually but I wear stuff to cover imperfections - I'm used to seeing darker eyebrows, having lighter skin around my eyes, bronzer cheeks and more defined eyes. Small differences but put together, give me a whole other impression of what my face looks like.

I'm getting used to the mirror thing but I'm still extremely uncomfortable with photos. I do NOT want to have any taken or to see any of myself right now whatsoever! Yesterday Miriam and Judith kept wanting to take photos of our jaunt to Patzcuaro but I couldn't do it. My conclusion is that country living is good for your self-image. How can you not feel comfortable with your own reflection unless it is covered by a mask? And I have a feeling that my experience is similar to that of how many of my girlfriends back home would react. And even more other women of Britain. We all need to spend some time in the forest and get back to extreme basics and TRULY realise that none of this shit matters whatsoever. We need to feel comfortable with or faces AS THEY ARE.